Where The Heart Is
by SnappleApple11
Summary: Their pillow talk was never usually serious, but when Killian brought up his past with Ursula, Emma listened. Post 4:14 "Unforgiven", pre 4:15. Comfort smut


**Their pillow talk was never usually serious, but when Killian brought up his past with Ursula, Emma listened. Post 4:14 "Unforgiven"**

**So Maleficent is back in action! Much like Cruella and Ursula, I forgot I missed her. Anywho, this is just my fan-theory of what exactly Killian did to Ursula that was apparently worse than breaking her heart. And because I'm a sucker for some CS smuttiness, there's an end-o'-drabblet BJ. **

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There were days where Emma and Killian reveled in sneaking around, finding a dark corner and having their way with each other like insatiable teenagers. The past six weeks had been filled with moments like those. Emma would call him into the sheriff's station on the pretext of lunch and then proceed to wrap her mouth around him until he begged her for mercy, or Killian would convince her to join him sailing around the bay and he would undress her just enough to take her with languid strokes that mirrored the rocking of the ocean waves.

And dear God, Killian had even started sexting.

He'd gotten so comfortable with cell phones that he had actually picked up sexting on his own. It caught her completely off guard the first time when she was out to dinner with her parents and she received a dick pic and a colorful, blush-inducing description of his current activities that had her clenching her thighs in the booth at Granny's. It had been all she could do to hastily excuse herself to a broom closet so she could reply and join in.

Moment like those made Emma happier than she could remember being in a very long time. It all made her giddy and excited in a way that left an unbreakable smile etched permanently onto her face and her stomach doing back flips.

But for all the times they flirted and teased each other, there were other times where one or both of them needed simple reassurance. They sought comfort in the sure strokes and firmer touches that left little room to think of whatever was truly bothering them, and they could both just bask in the afterglow while wrapped in the warmth of each other's arms. It was the way Emma had taken Killian after he had gotten his heart back after the Gold Affair (as Emma had taken to calling it in the privacy of her thoughts). She remembered the never-ending stream of touch and contact and just needing to be sure Killian was still there with her and she hadn't actually lost him.

Since that night Emma had done everything she could to stay in physical contact with Killian, needing the extra assurance, and Killian had seemed to need the contact just as much as she did. They held hands everywhere they went, rubbing fingers across skin absent-mindedly, no matter if they were walking or sitting. They wrapped arms around each other in loose embraces in many of the same scenarios, anchoring themselves to one another as they walked down the street or ate lunch at a table. And most notably, Emma had taken to keeping track of Killian's pulse whenever possible, especially when they were in bed together. The fluttering heartbeat under her tongue or her ear had turned into a sort of lullaby for her. As long as she could hear it's rhythmic cadence she could rest easy knowing Killian was still with her and hadn't been taken away.

Tonight though, his heart's usual pattering was hurried and restless where it hammered in his chest under her ear. Usually Killian was at his most calm after they made love, no matter the previous circumstances. For him to still be so tense could only mean something was still on his mind. She was loathe to bring it up but knew it would probably be for the best.

His hand had ceased running it's distracted lines along her arm and instead stilled on her back, curling around the bare skin and pulling her just a hair closer to him.

Emma tilted her head up at him, and ran a hand up his chest to rest against his jaw.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

His jaw relaxed for a moment only to tighten again in time with his arms around her.

"Emma, what I did to Ursula..." He trailed off, eyes glued to the ceiling.

Emma tilted her head to kiss whatever skin she could reach and soothed her hand along his chin and down his neck. "Killian if it's about what happened in the past it's ok. We talked about this before, you don't have to say what happened if you don't want to. I get it. You just looked worried is all."

He seemed to simultaneously deflate and tense at her words, a little unhappy at her response. "And I'm grateful for that love, truly I am. But Ursula physically being here changes things and with the dragon Maleficent's return I've been thinking about what it could mean."

"Maleficent coming back does change things." Emma couldn't help but feel a bit betrayed and guilty about that. She and Regina had vouched for the two women, wanted to see the best in them, but it only led to the revival of one of the most nefarious and feared magic users of the Enchanted Forest.

"Aye, I was wary of the sea witch before given our history, but now I fear her endgame may be far darker than I imagined."

"What did you think she wanted?"

"I thought perhaps she wanted to find a way home. But it seems I was mistaken." It was the way he spoke that surprised Emma, part disappointed and part expected. Maybe she hadn't been the only one hoping to see the two women turn over a new leaf after all.

"You thought she just wanted to go back to the Enchanted Forest?"

"Not exactly," He shook his head, took a deep breath, and slid his fingers through her golden hair, tilting his head to gaze at the strands while he gathered his thoughts. "What your parents said earlier love, fighting because they're villains and you're heroes, you and I both know it's far more complicated than that. Regina had a reason for casting the dark curse in the first place; she didn't wake up one morning with a whim to do so. And I didn't turn pirate out of greed, it was…" His voice caught in his throat and Emma pulled herself tighter to him, laying a comforting kiss to his shoulder.

"You said what you did to Ursula was worse than breaking her heart," She said gently.

"Aye. I took her home from her."

"What do you mean?"

"She wasn't always known as the sea witch. Back when I first encountered her in the early days of my piracy Ursula was a revered goddess, as all-powerful and tempestuous as the seas she ruled over. There are probably still many parts of the realm that worship her as such even in her lessened state."

This only confused Emma but a sinking feeling in her gut started to form and she dreaded the increasingly inevitable role that Killian was doomed to play in this story.

"You said you took her home from her…"

"My crew and I stole from her, from one of her island palaces. It wasn't as though we were in great need of her gold or magic, we saw a chance to gain some infamy and we took it. It was reckless and foolish and more for the thrill of the chase than anything else. It's not one my prouder moments love," He admitted, finally meeting Emma's gaze with eyes a deep and remorseful blue.

"Remember who you're talking to Killian, I've got a criminal record of my own and I sure as hell remember a thrill whenever I got away with something." She tried cracking a small smile, knowing it would not alleviate his pain entirely but hoping it might curb some of the guilt.

His half-smile didn't reach his eyes, but it was more than he'd shown before, so Emma took it as a good sign. "I can't even remember all that we stole save for one item, a pendant filled with enchanted sand said to grant a sea-born wearer legs or a land-born wearer fins. I was the one carrying the pendant as we fled her wrath. We had nearly reached the Jolly Roger, but in a moment of thoughtless haste I threw the pendant at her feet. I've no earthly idea why I did it; I probably thought she would try and catch the damn thing, and that it might slow her down for even an instant. But it shattered at her feet and the sand turned into a gas that engulfed her. I didn't stay to watch and I fled with the rest of the crew back to the Jolly, putting the ship back out to sea to gain as much distance between us and that accursed island as possible."

"That pendent. What exactly did it do?" Emma felt she already knew the answer but didn't want to accept it as reality until she heard it from Killian.

"Ursula the goddess was always capable of moving seamlessly between land and sea, but the shattered pendant, it took away part of who she was and trapped her in one state of being. Because of me, not only did she lose a good portion of her power, but Ursula can never again enter the oceans. She can never truly return home."

If anyone had asked Emma to sympathize with such a thing as never going home before she had come to Storybrooke and found her family, Emma knew it would have been impossible. But now that she had a place and people that she cared so deeply for, it made empathizing with Ursula's pain that much easier and that much more heartbreaking. Home was where the heart was. It was the place you missed when you weren't there, and from the sound of it, Ursula had been missing her home for centuries.

"She didn't turn into what your parents would call a villain until after our encounter, so in many ways I am responsible for her fall from grace," Killian continued, eyes still locked with hers but looking right through her, mind far away.

"Killian don't do that to yourself," Emma said adamantly, fingers curling around his jaw further and eyes pleading with him. "What happened is in the past and there's no changing it to what we want. What Ursula chooses to do with her life is her business, and if she wanted to use this chance to go back to the oceans then I could support that. But you were right, Maleficent being here changes things." She didn't want to say it aloud but she knew Killian had already considered it in colorful detail, the notion that Ursula was in Storybrooke not only to revive Maleficent but to exact revenge on Killian. And if Ursula was as observant and smart as Emma suspected she was, then she would know to go after Killian's heart, which lay with Emma.

Emma didn't know what Ursula's exact plans were or how they fit in with Cruella and Maleficent, even if she could guess at the framework. What she did know was that right now Killian was underneath her in his bed at Granny's and worrying over her safety being at risk because of his past.

She moved upwards to kiss him, slow and sweet. He opened under her after only a moment's hesitation, letting their tongues tangle together briefly until she pulled away to lean her forehead against his.

"Whatever it is they're all up to, we'll figure it out together. You've said it before, we make a hell of a team Killian."

Emma slid down his body, making sure to let her skin rub sensually against his and kissing every inch of skin exposed to her. Her hands set to explore on her downward trek, gliding over his nipples and sides and everywhere else she knew he was sensitive, all in the hopes of getting him to relax.

"I'm right here, Killian, and I'm not going anywhere." It seemed to do the trick and by the time her mouth reached the hard planes of his belly, dipping in and out of his belly button, he was breathing deeper and his limbs were noticeably looser.

He tensed up again when her hands reached closer to his aching length, but in wanted anticipation and eagerness. Emma's breath was hot on his skin as she smoothed her hands up and down his thighs, building him up in a light tease before the main event.

"Let me take care of you for once. You're always taking such good care of me, I think it's only fair I return the favor."

He was already half hard at her ministrations, and when she took him in her hand he hardened fully, his member springing to life in erection. Killian groaned at her touch, oddly quiet for him, but Emma didn't question it. She decided he'd had enough on his mind this evening that he probably didn't even realize he wasn't his usual talkative self.

Her hand strokes alternated between slow and fast, wanting to hold him near his high for as long as possible. Killian's breathing grew shallow as she worked, groaning every so often on a particularly hard stroke. She kept stroking him while kissing her way down his stomach to join her hand, moving it to his base. She flicked her tongue out against his tip, already beading with pre cum, and reveled in the way his hand moved to twine through her hair in a gentle caress.

"Bloody fuck, Emma." It was the most vocal he had been all evening. Even when they made love earlier in the night he had been unusually quiet, refraining from his usual dirty talk and innuendos in favor of putting his mouth to other uses. Emma always loved when he went down on her with his talented tongue, but had wondered why he was so much less talkative than normal. Now that Emma knew what had been on his mind though she could hardly blame him for his earlier silence.

She licked around his tip once more before running her tongue along his length from base to head, hand still holding steady pressure on his base. His moan of approval echoed around the sparse room, and Emma couldn't find it in her to care if any of the other tenants heard them.

Emma took him fully into her mouth, bobbing up and down on the length with increasing speed, controlling his build toward that glorious peak with her tongue. She normally loved being in such total control of him like this, but this wasn't about power or control, it was about physical reassurance. It was to show him she was there and that she wanted to take care of him, to help him like he helped her.

Her bobbing pace slowed suddenly and she relaxed her throat, letting him slide as deep as she could get him until his tip hit the back of her throat.

"Oh fuck, that's- Swan!"

Emma knew her change in pace and the sudden deepness were driving him crazy, and she kept it up for several more moments before switching back to shallower but faster strokes of her mouth. Her tongue licked along the bottom of his length, running along the sensitive vein there and causing him to moan loudly. Emma chuckled around him, the vibrations shooting through him and forcing him to bow his back in further elation.

She lifted her other hand to his tightening balls to gently fondle them, and moved her other hand up and down the base of his length in time with her mouth. The combination brought him to his peak and he came with a hoarse cry of her name.

"Gods, Emma!"

Killian emptied himself in long salty strings down her throat and she did her best to swallow as much as she could. She kept up her bobbing to milk him dry and bring him down gently from his peak. Afterward, when he was sated and bleary-eyed, she licked her lips clean and slinked her way back up his body to kiss his neck and chin. Killian grabbed the back of her head and fused their mouths together, tasting himself on her tongue.

He sank back against the pillow with a sigh and curled his arms around her, moving his head to her neck and breathing her in. "Gods Swan," He said, breathless and worshipful. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

Emma could only smile at him, hoping the gesture could fully convey just how much she loved him.

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**Again, this is purely fan-theory of what happened between Killian and Ursula. For all anyone knows she turns out to be his mom or some distant relative or knows where his parents are/what happened to them. Idk. Just a drabblet of unscientific theory. **


End file.
